Need as a Driver

[Reflecting on J.F. who did a great job of sharing while we were gone]

I always thought my guilt was a Catholic thing, but now I'm beginning to see it's just me...

And then she went to Scripture, to see what God says about it. As Jordan says, "She's preaching the gospel to herself!"

There is something about your Word coming alive to us – it is often driven by need: the needs of others; our need as we start trying to help others. Somehow, being thrust into a position where people depend on us (they need us, and at the same time their needs are beyond us) – somehow that often activates something in us spiritually. Need is a driver of spiritual growth...

So how do we put people in these positions more often?

I think the answer is clusters... low level, lightweight leadership, with regular meetings (over dinner) with me and Marilyn. The goal must be – whatever they do (whatever we ask them to do) – to be lightweight and sustainable.

But we also need enough people that we're bursting at the seams [when all together]. The reason for clusters needs to be driven by need as well. It can't be artificial...

At the heart of whatever happens (doing/leading) there needs to be a knowing of God, self, grace better... and also a sense of call. At the end of the day, seems like a couple of things:

1. our people need a lot of basic knowledge – stories, plotlines, vocabulary, basic skills (along with how how to read, pray, hear, respond)
2. they also need a sense of the stakes (personally, and for the church)
3. they need a sense of calling (neighbors, neighborhood, work)

Lord, one of the greatest gifts you can give us is need or adversity... these are the only things severe enough to drive us to you. We Americans live such comfortable lives... our idols need to be exposed as frauds (and usually when that happens, we experience great anxiety, trepidation, need). We do not wish need on anyone (or seek to bring it on ourselves). But we pray (and trust) that you will do precisely what is best for us...

Very little of what I have written over the past 15 years is profound enough to be worth reading multiple times.

And yet I believe that you have taught me deeply profound things...

At the end of the day, my story is still a very small one. Yet it feels so very profound to me, particularly as I begin to make sense of it, and of you. Thank you that my worth and value does not derive from my accomplishments, my successes, my failures, my ability to write...

And yet if you keep my tears in your bottle (Psalm 56), then surely, all these non-profound-yet-deeply-personal/painful parts are precisely what you ruminate on.

And all of this has happened through my great need for you...